Whether you have been divorced years or months you probably dread Valentine’s Day. It’s a reminder of the fact that you’re divorced and don’t have a special someone to spend the day with.
Valentine’s Day is known as a day for lovers, romance, flowers and candlelit dinners. Every time you turn on the television, you’re bombarded by Hallmark commercials and restaurants advertising their romantic Valentine’s Day dinners for two.
There isn’t any other holiday that reminds you so dramatically that you are no longer part of a couple, you are no longer married, you are, in fact, divorced. Valentine’s Day might also cause some fears and anxieties about the thought of finding another relationship.
I feel your pain…. this is my eight year of celebrating Valentines as a divorced woman. Some years I had dates and others I did whats listed below.
The Divorced Woman’s Valentine’s Day Survive Guide
- Volunteer at your children’s Valentine’s school party. I know this holiday is supposed to be about couples and love, but classrooms decorated in paper hearts and kids munching on conversation hearts is a great way to spend the holiday.
- Remember the importance of self-love buy yourself beautiful flowers. Pamper yourself with a massage or manicure & pedicure. Remind yourself you deserve it and get yourself a special gift.
- Who needs a valentine when you and your girlfriends have each other? Round up your girls, draw names from a hat, and buy whomever you draw a little something. Get all dolled up and enjoy a night out on the town. Try a karaoke bar, because let’s face it, when is karaoke anything but a good time?
- It can be tempting to spend Valentine’s Day on the couch in sweat pants and watching The Notebook with a box of chocolates. Instead gather up your single friends (male & female) that don’t have dates and go to dinner and dance the night away. I did this one year and meet someone we date for a while.
- How about doing something loving for someone else who may not have anyone with whom to share the day? Take a widow to lunch. Sometimes shifting our focus helps when throwing our-self a pity party
- Do something fun that has nothing whatsoever to do with roses, fine dining, or greeting cards. Be adventurous this Valentine’s Day.
- Get together with a group of friends who are in the same boat, have a nice dinner with good conversation.Go have fun and don’t waste the night on your sorrows of being single.”
So, while those of us who are fortunate enough to have a date this Valentines, we should be mindful of those who, for this year, at least, have missed Cupid’s arrow.
You may or may not want to find a new special someone. Either way, it’s okay. Don’t fall into the trap of what’s supposed to be. Celebrate what is. You’ll be in a meaningful relationship soon enough. With it comes responsibility and ties that bind. In the meantime, enjoy the freedom that comes with being single.
You are special and you are loved. Life is going pretty well – all in all. Don’t let Valentine’s Day be a reason to doubt yourself. My wish for you this Valentines is that you’ll spend it doing what brings you the most joy in life
I hope your Valentine’s Day is filled with love and every day after that too.